LIFE’S LIKE THAT!

WE CAN WRITE ANYTHING!
Writers: We are writers for hire! Perhaps you would like to employ our services?
Editor: Have you brought along samples of your work?
Writers: We can write anything—poetry, short stories, novels, academic treatises, anything. Even children’s books!
Editor: Have you brought along samples of your work that I could take a look at?
Writers: I’m afraid we have no samples. We just want to make money. We don’t want royalties. We can’t wait for royalties. We just want cash where we can spend straightaway.
Editor: To tell you the truth, it isn’t easy making money from books. Perhaps I could recommend you some other jobs where you can earn lots of money!
Writers: You just tell us what you want!
Editor: Why don’t you write me the eighth Harry Potter book? That would be a great place to start.
Writers: Huh!

I WANT THIS, I WANT THAT!
Writer: I want to write my own flap copy!
Editor: You can’t even write proper English!
Writer: I want to decide on the title of the book!
Editor: All your proposed titles suck big time!
Writer: I want to decide how the cover looks!
Editor: You should spend more time mending your fractured English—not bickering with your editor over the cover!
Writer: I’m really disappointed!
Editor: Get use to it. Life’s like that, if you haven’t realised!
Writer: In school, I was always told that my English is excellent.
Editor: Then you better ask your teacher to publish your book!